“Nobody knew you send me texts all day putting a smile on my face. Or texts at night saying “Goodnight, sleep well beautiful,” & texts in the morning saying “Good morning, did you sleep well?” Nobody understood why I fell for you. All they saw was the result: a broken heart.”—(via poeticheartache)
One year, is just another year that you’ve been obliviously meeting a stranger over and over. One week, is just another week that you go to all the places you usually do, Once or twice in that week you go past a complete stranger, You’ve probably seen them and they’ve seen you but your brain never registers them. Then one day, it’s just another day that you do everything you usually do, Then in the spur of just one moment, You meet, And suddenly they mean so much, And suddenly every second of eye contact is noticeable before, during and after you see them. And you tell them all your secrets as they do theirs. Suddenly you know who their friends are, you know what they talk about during their days, and you know what kind of person they are. Then suddenly, It really hits you.
“Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat, or will stay awake just to watch you sleep… wait for the boy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who thinks you’re just as pretty without makeup on. One who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares and how lucky he is to have you… The one who turns to his friends and says, ‘that’s her.”—Unknown? (via kari-shma) (via quote-book)
After my bruise, lack of sleep and workout, I want to collapse. I don’t even care if I do it in a maths room. That is serious stuff.
Anyways, I find it so fucking annoying that people do shit, that is just so stupid and wrong, Then they sympathise their way out of it, and say they don’t even remember doing it. Seriously sweetie, you’re just not fooling anyone, just admit you’re a fucking bitch, Leave it there.
Eclipse is coming out soon and i’m like, FREAKING GEED! They better make the tent scene good, i’m like, REALLY REALLY looking forward to that scene, so freaking epic.
I’m like dying without an SLR camera, seriously I just go past everything and it’s like WOW THAT’S REALLY PRETTY! *takes photo with digi* Oh, yuck. FAARR OUUTTTTT :(
Second the holidays hit, SINGLETON TIME :) I cannot wait to go up, get some photos, hang out with my Aunty Jodie, make up really evil plans about my little brother with my Evil Twosome cousin Teliah. Maybe if she can tear herself away from her high paying job at 17, Shylie could take time to give me some attention, lol.
I’m looking forward to the car ride just as much as i’m looking forward to spending time with them, Nearly 1 1/2 hours in the car with my ipod in and camera on my lap, ready to snap snap. Then a quick stop at Maccas to pee and grab food. Back in the car for another hour, and then Newcastle with the bigger family pond :) Stay there for a couple of hours and then on our way to Singleton with another 45 minutes in the car.
Oh my god I have soo many books to get through. THEY ARE ALL SO FUCKING TEMPTING. But I have to do my history elective assignment.. It was only due 4 1/2 weeks ago. So umm. Fail.
Anyways I wrote all this in a towel so i’m off to put on some clothes,
I really wish it was raining right now. I could lie out in the rain and let my problems drown out into the drain. Nothing would matter. My tears would be hidden. The pain would subside for the time being. Rain brings me joy. It just comes down. It isn’t complicated, it doesn’t come with conditions, I don’t have to wait for it to come to me, It just pours down on me and I embrace it. It’s cooling to my anger, Soothing at my hurt, But most of all I love that wherever I am, whatever I look like and whatever i’ve done, It never fails to find me.
Everytime I feel happy, something goes wrong. I start to realise the joy of something, then I can’t have it. I find exactly what I want, and it’s too far away. It doesn’t really matter anyways, it was a lie for himself. I found something that felt nice and helpful, I got comfy in it and then I found the hope that it could be better. I felt so good, just being able to think about the future happiness it could bring. This was the time when I would get what I deserved to experience, And it was being delivered by someone great, who knew how to act.
But I guess they decided the address was wrong, because they’re changing their mind. Veering in the other direction, All I can hope is that they turn back around..
But i’m starting to realise that life isn’t a fairytale. Love brings heartbreak, Mine’s cracked just from the hope of it. A lot of people are bad people. Nothing is ever perfect. Karma really is a fucking bitch.
But mostly, I just don’t think it’s right for me to be settled and happy anymore.
Meet a Keeper at Taronga Zoo was really helpful to me, seeing as I am seriously considering a career along those lines. The information that we learnt wasn’t really that important to you guys though, so hear is how the day went :)
At 8:15am in the fucking freezing cold, we were at Randwick waiting for a bus to come and take us into the city. Everyones sitting there in their layers and bulky jumpers, and I am there in a singlet and a thin jumper. So normal right? On the bus Lucia and I get into a Jacob vs. Edward debate, quite normal for us actually. We all catch up on the latest news and pretty soon, we’re in the freezing cold again waiting for a ferry. FAST FORWARDING TO WHEN WE ACTUALLY GET THERE, We go in and take photos with the AWESOME stuffed koala out the front, and of course check out the gift shop, as any normal kids do. I really, really, really, REALLY want that giant snow leopard :(
After all the talks about what the different positions are, and after some of the keepers told us their own story, we headed into the zoo. Now we all had lanyards, saying which behind the scenes tour we were going on, Fi, Nev, Lucia and I all got the Nocturnal Animals. Lucia was quite distraught that she didn’t get to see the giraffes. SO we head down to them to make her happy, haha talk about your ass raping. The giraffes were so beautiful and awesome, Lucia was constantly trying to imitate their long necks and basically just perving at them for 15 minutes.
Next we checked out the reptiles, they were like, AWESOME! The snakes, frogs, lizards, scorpians and the ANACONDA!! SO FREAKING COOL! :) Not much else to say about them.
So we headed down to the penguins to wait for the seal show to start, we found this GIANT aquariam wall that was so absolutely amazing I had to get a photo even though it was empty. We realised we were late for the seal show and we bolted up to the stage. The guy tells us that it’s being held down at the penguins. Well fuck. SOO we ran back down and caught the show, it was REALLY AWESOME!
Everyone was hungry so we grabbed some lunch at the food court. Never try to save money there, such a rip off.
After that we got a bit lost getting to the nocturnal house, but after being told off by a woman that worked there we found it. The tour guy showed us a frozen rat, frozen mice, frozen baby mice, and someone ate a worm thing. YUMMYYY!!! He brought out this little possum glider thing, I can’t exactly remember its name but it was soo small and its heart beat felt like a vibration!
We left there after ducking into the actual exhibit and checked out the lions, SO SO SO SO PRETTY!! THERE WAS A NALA, SIMBA AND A MUFASA!! :D They started roaring together and I thought it was SO fucking cute I was nearly crying!! Tigers were next and once again, THEY WERE SO FREAKING STUNNING! :) It came right up against the glass and I froze, it was so so beautiful, it just stood there staring at the door, its eyes were so intense but calm. It was, epic.
We found the bird show last, that was really fun and interesting to watch. The wedge-tail eagle is like, beautiful. I know i’ve said that about almost every animal but I do love all of them and they are ALL beautiful! The one thing is, I think that the end was the best part of the show. They played something like, a remix of ‘My Island Home’ and had doves, eagles, cockatoos and galars all flying around, it was very touching.
I wanted so badly to lie down next to him on the bed, to lay down next to him and sleep. Just to sleep next to him, in the most innocent sense of the idea. But I lacked the courage and he liked this other girl and I was weird and he was gorgeous and I was hopelessly average and he was just amazing.
Graduated High School. Kissed someone. Smoked a cigarette. Got so drunk you passed out. Rode every ride at an amusement park. Collected something really stupid. Gone to a rock concert. Helped someone. Gone fishing. Watched four movies in one night. Gone long periods of time with out sleep. Lied to someone. Snorted cocaine. Failed a class. Smoked weed. Dealt drugs. Been in a car accident. Been in a tornado. Done hard drugs (i.e. ecstasy, heroin, crack, meth, acid). Watched someone die. Been to a funeral. Burned yourself. (Accidentally) Ran a marathon. Cried yourself to sleep. Spent over $200 in one day. Flown on a plane. Cheated on someone. Been cheated on. Written a 10 page letter. Gone skiing. Been sailing. Cut yourself. (Not on purpose) Had a best friend. Lost someone you loved. Shoplifted something. Been to jail. Dangerously close to being in jail. Had detention. Skipped school. Got in trouble for something you didn’t do. Stolen books from the library. Gone to a different country. Dropped out of school. Been in a mental hospital. Watched the “Harry Potter” movies. Had an online diary. Fired a gun. Gambled in a casino. Had a yard sale. Had a lemonade stand. Actually made money at the lemonade stand. Been in a school play. Been fired from a job. Taken a lie detector test. Swam with dolphins. Gone to sea world. Voted for someone on a reality TV show. Written poetry. Read more than 20 books a year. Gone to Europe. Loved someone you shouldn’t have. Used a coloring book over age 12. Had surgery. Had stitches. Taken a taxi. Seen the Washington Monument. Had more than 5 IM’s/online conversations going at once. Overdosed. Had a drug or alcohol problem. Been in a fist fight. Suffered any form of abuse. Had a hamster. Petted a wild animal. Used a credit card. Gone surfing in California. Did “spirit day” at school. Dyed your hair. Got a tattoo. Had something pierced. Got straight A’s. Been on the Honor Roll. Known someone with HIV or AIDS. Taken pictures with a webcam. Started a fire. Gotten caught having a party while parents were gone away.
She's the type of girl who wouldn't know what to do if a guy tried to kiss her. She wouldn't know what to say if a guy asked her out. She'd spend so much time daydreaming but when the real thing happens, she'll be starstruck because she would never believe she's beautiful enough to be loved.
I cannot believe how much one person can be so fucking ungrateful, and lie, so fucking much. But even more I cannot believe you keep believing it, and helping her. It’s just totally beyond me, we give you everything, then one little part of your ‘perfect’ lie is in jeopardy and you get greedy, so you act as though we’re the worst people on earth. In your life, we have given you the equivelant of 3 times anyone your age.
Why don’t you just shut the fuck up, and let us go.